My mom married my dad the same age as mine today. She then came along with my father, went out of their town to try their luck in Manila. My dad, a very courageous man, tried different jobs while my mom got pregnant with their first, child. Until they got another job, together, from a generous family. My dad served as the residence’s security guard (as their boss was somehow connected to politics), and my mom as cook (well, yeah she cooks very well). They served there for years. They had two-three more children (including me). And til I was six, my parents decided to quit their jobs, and have and focus on their own home instead.
As we all knew, living in the province may be some kind of hard, and freeing at the same time. But that was the least among everything my mom have been through. Mom grew up in the province, with enough food, good shelter, nice dresses. She had no enough time to bond or at least know more about her parents, or even her siblings, though. She actually have step-siblings, I’m not sure if she’s the only child of her parents, I don’t want to ask. She didn’t make it to college, even highschool. When she got a job in Manila, it was honestly awful, and though I was still little then, I knew her job was tiring, stressful, and everything in between. But she did it anyway. She had to. My parents had to. For us.
When Toyo’s still inside my belly, my sister and I talked about our life back then or how we lived our life back then. My mom worked there for the longest time. My sister told me awful stories I honestly had to cut because I was about to cry. But I’m sharing some now.
During my pregnancy, my sister said I was lucky I have a great job at the office and I work for a very kind and considerate company. As when my mom was pregnant with me, she was serving another family. My belly was super heavy I couldn’t walk, and I just needed to inform my boss I couldn’t make it to the office and she’d say “okay be well take rest do not go online do not work”. My mom’s boss required her to work even in the wee hours, even in the middle of her sleep, just to cook “pulutan” for the “big guys”. There were times I cried in the middle of the night because of back pain, and because I couldn’t sleep well. There were time my mom cried because she couldn’t even get up from her fever but she had to, because her boss needed her.
It was her job, anyway. If she didn’t cook, that family might have starved. It would be my mom’s problem, wouldn’t it?
I’m sharing this not to put shame on my mom. I am proud of her. I’m sharing this not to blame that family they served. Like I said, it was her job and they were already kind enough to give us a living and even a shelter. I am sharing this because I get it now. All the pain, all the tears, sacrifices, etc. All of it. I get it now.
I was supposed to write an open letter, but my mom won’t be able to read it anyway. I can always write it on a paper and give it to her instead. But I’m sharing her story with the hopes of my readers – especially you, boys – to understand being a mom, too. Nah, forgive me, but posting your little sweet messages on Facebook are bullshit. (But I did it anyway, lol.)Say it directly to your moms, hug them, and make them feel you’re there beside them instead of being just there online. Alam nating lahat na mahirap maging nanay. Alam din ng nanay natin na na-appreciate natin yon kahit na matigas yung uo natin o nasasagot natin sila minsan. Oo, kahit hindi natin sabihin sa isa’t isa na we love each other, okay lang kasi alam naman na natin yon. But you know what I learned now that I’m already a mom? Well, a lot. But one of them is words are as valuable as actions. Words can kill someone, and it can also give someone a reason to live.
So yep, salute to all moms out there. Happy Mothers’ day.
