themhayonnaise

Sometimes, it takes balls to be a woman

Updated 10 May 2020.
I’m a mom for two years now, and I know my life challenges are just a teenie tiny part of what other women are experiencing. To those moms who choose to stay brave and strong, I am very proud of you. And to all moms who worry to much, please know that there is at least one person who’s looking forward to your success as a mother and please do not disappoint that kid. It takes balls to be a woman, so yeah, let’s all be proud of our balls! HAHA!
Happy Mothers’ Day to us, and to all single Dads wearing a mom’s hat! <3
This article was first published on Feb 2018, and I have updated few of my kwento here to make it more relatable to others. Well, hoping for it’s success! Enjoy reading!

My post about Toyo’s 23rd week is still earning views. But, to be honest, I feel guilty making it public. I mean, I could’ve just opened it up to few of my closest friends and to my family, instead of publishing it online. I thought having the “balls” as a woman means voicing out your thoughts and feelings and that’s it – you’re an instant hero.

I didn’t mean to make him look bad. I was just sooo angry I needed to let it all out without thinking of what would he feel. So I don’t regret it either. Knowing a number of guy friends doing it, even those I thought I really knew well, or I trusted so much, sobra akong nagalit. I’ve been there, I’ve done that. Now I just realized my karma.

I know it’ll hurt forever. And I needed to find some source of strength and courage for my child. Thank you, by the way, for reading it and for understanding me. Also, thanks for appreciating my blog. That was the first time I published my WP blog on Facebook and made it readable by everyone. I’d rather write, so at least other people can hear me, too, or better, learn from my experiences. Isahang kwento nalang. From now on, I’ll be an open book. And I’ll flex my “woman balls” na.

The Power to Speak

Sorry to say this, but the power of speaking is not everybody’s thing. If I were me five years before, I’d stay silent. Maybe brag about myself being a “woman” and “having balls” in my personal and private diary. But hey, we’re here.

I’m not contradicting my previous post, though. In fact, I’d like to promote it AGAIN today – here’s the link. Lol. And tell everyone, especially girls, not to be afraid to speak out. People may find you maarte or madrama or even papansin, well that is sadly labeled as “normal” already, but it is more important for you to find a way to overcome your fears and depression. If blogging it away is not your thing, maybe just talk to someone about it – someone you trust or maybe a complete stranger like me. 🙂 Hindi nalulutas ang problema sa ganong paraan, pero nakakaagaan talaga sa pakiramdam. You can talk to me any time through my social media accounts and even via email, connect@themhayonnaise.com.

"Sometimes, you need to step outside, get some air, and remind yourself of who you are and where you want to be."
Gossip Girl

I am lucky to be in an environment I can openly share my stories and thoughts. I understand not everyone can do that or have a choice to do the same. It is one of your rights, but there are also things to be considered – such as privacy, and of course, other people’s reactions. And I do understand that. I don’t mean you don’t have the “balls” I am talking about, I know you have something you can be proud of. And this is mine.

The Power to Appreciate Life and Achieve Goals

One thing I am also thankful for is the consistent growth of my career, and that companies form different industries are continuously seeing my potential in my profession.

Good thing my profession is in demand these days. (Which reminds me, if you’re an auditor and interested to talk about new opportunities, leave a comment below, or email your CV to connect@themhayonnaise.com. I may have some connections I can refer you to.)

So I super thank God, who always strengthens me to do a job well. I also have to mention all my mentors, bosses, and leaders who are STILL helping and guiding me up to this day (oh, I feel soooo lucky I have you!). And, of course, to my bestest friends and family that are always supporting me and believing in what I can do best.

One friend once told me “hindi mo utang na loob yan. pinaghirapan mo yan.” which has a point. But think of yourself getting no help from others, would you still be able to do the same? Do you think you’d be a better and grown person than before? What if God is too busy polishing another part of your life, NOT your career, do you think you’d still be doing okay? What if you were living alone with no family at all, would you still have inspirations? What if you didn’t have the nicest bosses to mentor and guide you, would you do better?

The Power to Bear

Aaaannnd yes! Announcing this here today. Toyo is a GIRL!!! When the doctor said I could already know the gender, I said wag muna sakin, please separate the print. Because I wasn’t that excited. I thought either a boy or a girl is okay, so I didn’t mind them to keep it secret from me.

My officemate came up to this short (and sweet!) gender reveal chuchu while we’re having our breakky last Monday. Sorry to those who thought were not invited. Invited kayo talaga and I think Jian and the others were expecting a real “party” talaga, but I insisted bec I was really excited na.

Kasalanan ng mga online shops, which I usually visit whenever I have idle or free time. They’re soooo cute. I got too excited to choose from those little onesies and shoes. Plus, I have decided about the real name of the baby soooo…

Now, I am mooooore than excited to see Toyo. Honestly, I am already busy for planning the baby shower (update: and I did it!) and name reveal. Hope everyone in my list can attend the event. <3 See you all there!

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